Any parent of toddlers will tell you that these first two are a given. When my kids were little there was just VHS tapes so I had a few seconds of sanity while the tape rewound where I could pray for the tape to break or jam so I didn’t have to hear it for the hundred and eleventith time that day. Now with all of the digital delivery systems (Chromecast, Amazon Fire, Roku, Apple TV…) that can be set to repeat ad infinitum, I don’t know how parents stay sane. Turn off the router, maybe?
The Barney Theme Song
Barney is a dinosaur from our imagination
And when he’s tall
He’s what we call a dinosaur sensation.
The Sesame Street Theme Song
Everything’s a-okay
Family, neighbors, friends
That’s where we meet
Can you tell me how to get,
How to get to sesame street?
How to get to sesame street?
How to get to sesame street?
How to get to sesame street?
And there were a couple that made sure to let the terrorist know just who they had pissed off.
America by Neil Diamond
Everywhere around the world
They’re coming to America
Ev’ry time that flag’s unfurled
They’re coming to America!
American Pie by Don McLean – It’s not the song that’s torture, it’s that they refused to explain the lyrics.
Did you write the book of love
And do you have faith in God above
If the Bible tells you so?
Do you believe in rock and roll?
Can music save your mortal soul?
And can you teach me how to dance real slow?
Stayin’ Alive the theme to Saturday Night Fever by The BeeGees. If it were me being interrogated, I would tell them everything they want to know just to make the disco music stop.
Well, you can tell by the way I use my walk,
I’m a woman’s man: no time to talk.
Music loud and women warm, I’ve been kicked around
Since I was born.
And now it’s all right. It’s OK.
And you may look the other way.
We can try to understand
The New York Times‘ effect on man.
Some of them don’t seem that offensive on the surface. Babylon by David Gray, for example. Nice easy melody and it seems that the Babylon reference might inspire nostalgia and give them some resolve not to talk. On the other hand, dude, you’ve been blind and a fool.
Friday night I’m going nowhere
All the lights are changing green to red
Turning over TV stations
Situations running through my head
Looking back through time
You know it’s clear that I’ve been blind, I’ve been a fool
To open up my heart to all that jealousy,
That bitterness, that ridicule.
Or Raspberry Beret by Prince. Such an upbeat song about a woman who dares to show her skin! And hair!
She wore a
Raspberry beret
The kind you find in a second hand store
Raspberry beret
And if it was warm she wouldn’t wear much more
Raspberry beret
I think I love her.
They mixed in some metal for a nice contrast. Songs like Fuck Your God by Deicide. I’m not including any of the lyrics because you can’t understand them! It seems like any metal song would work as well, unless they told them the title. That’s what I’d do. Play this song and say, “This is called Fuck Your God.” Then I’d play a bunch of different metal songs and say that all of them are called Fuck Your God.
Other artists who made the CIA playlist include AC/DC. Eminem, Dope, Metallica, 2Pac (Tupac), Christina Aguilera, Rage Against the Machine, and Matchbox 20.
I don’t know how much thought the CIA put into this list but I do know that they’ve been out done by a couple of 11-year-old boys.
Or would have been out done if it weren’t for this..I am linking to it against my better judgement. Imagine hours of hearing that and only that.